


Someday

by ireallydowritelikeimrunningoutoftime



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Angst, Background/Mentioned Relationships, Canon Divergence, Canon Era, Death, F/M, Falling In Love, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, I Made Myself Cry, I Will Go Down With This Ship, I'm Sorry, Love, Pip and Theo Are So Cute Together, Short Story
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-09
Updated: 2020-05-10
Packaged: 2021-03-02 05:54:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 7
Words: 8,389
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23989957
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ireallydowritelikeimrunningoutoftime/pseuds/ireallydowritelikeimrunningoutoftime
Summary: "Philip. Call me Philip.""It was a pleasure to meet you.""Likewise, Miss Burr." He threw a charming grin her way, and Theodosia felt her heart flutter for a brief moment, before shaking her head. She had a feeling Philip would be sticking around.There were once two young lovers named Philip and Theodosia. This is their story.
Relationships: Theodosia Burr & Philip Hamilton, Theodosia Burr/Philip Hamilton
Comments: 12
Kudos: 55





	1. Call Me Philip/Dear Theodosia

**Author's Note:**

> In real life, Theodosia Burr married Joseph Alston in February the same year Philip died, so that won't be happening. I know Angelica Schuyler Church moved back from London in 1797, and in the story, Theodosia is sixteen and Philip seventeen at the time of the "Winter's Ball" (I couldn't come up with anything original), so that would be 1799. The annual ball and the description of their house is fictional, but I do know that Angelica and her husband hosted frequent balls in their residence, and that Philip Hamilton visited his aunt at some point or another. At their first meeting, Theodosia is thirteen and Philip is fourteen, if anyone wishes to know their ages.

Theodosia Burr hummed softly to herself as she tended to the flowers growing in the small garden outside of her house. She plucked a rose from the ground, inhaling its sweet scent as she bent down to pull out a few lilacs that had caught her eye. She did not notice the boy who was strolling down the sidewalk, making his way towards her. "Excuse me?" he asked politely, startling her. Theodosia whirled around, finding herself almost face to face with a boy who looked about her age. He was rather good-looking, with dark curls and merry brown eyes.

"Pardon me," she said, aware that she was staring at him and irritated at herself for taking note of his handsome features. "I was not aware of your presence."

"Is this your garden?" he asked, gesturing at the patch of flowers in front of him. Theodosia hesitated.

"It- it was my mother's. I take care of it for her." The boy opened his mouth, then promptly closed it, looking a little embarrassed.

"'Tis alright," she said quietly. "You can ask."

"What happened to her, if you be willing to tell me?" Theodosia drew a sharp breath.

"She died when I was eleven. She loved this garden. The roses were her favorite flowers." His eyes widened in sympathy, and Theodosia winced, already preparing for the words of pity that were sure to follow. 

"The garden is beautiful," he blurted out. "Just like you." Theododia looked him right in the eye for a moment, before bursting into laughter at the mortified look on his face, which only increased his horror. "I apologize, I never meant- my mind was not clear-" he stammered, face as red as the rose in her hands.

"Thank you," she said, smiling at him. He looked relieved.

"My name is Philip. Philip Hamilton."

"Hamilton?" Theodosia asked, startled. She remembered her father mentioning the name Hamilton on multiple occasions, usually while fuming about something that had happened at work. "Be careful," he had once warned Theodosia, when she was a young child. "Any Hamilton must be approached with caution." She wondered if this flustered boy in front of him was in any way connected with the man her father so hated. "Have you any relation with Alexander Hamilton?"

"He is my father," Philip said, straightening his back with pride. 

Well, Theodosia thought, regardless of what Father thinks, he does not seem at all that bad. "My name is Theodosia. Theodosia Burr." She wondered if he would recognize her name.

"Burr?" he asked, now openly staring at her. "Is Aaron Burr your father?" Theodosia nodded.

"I dare not suppose your father spoke of him with fondness?" Philip shook his head.

"Quite the contrary. But I cannot hold it against you, I most certainly do not think you are-" he lapsed into silence once more, before his quick tongue could humiliate him yet again. Theodosia laughed.

"I quite like you, Mister Hamilton," she stated, grinning at him.

"I suppose I feel similarly towards you, Miss Burr," he said, bowing his head. "Our fathers' opinions matter not; let us be friends from this day forward. Perhaps we can convince them to change their minds about each other."

"Perhaps," she agreed. "In the meantime, I would love to be your friend."

"May I accompany you to the park before supper tomorrow?" he asked. "To become better acquainted with each other."

"I would be delighted, Mister-"

"Philip," he interrupted. "Call me Philip."

"Philip, then. It was a pleasure to meet you."

"Likewise, Miss Burr." He threw a charming grin her way, and Theodosia felt her heart flutter for a brief moment, before shaking her head. She had a feeling Philip would be sticking around.  
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Theodosia treasured the summers when Philip was home; it was the only time of the year when they could spend time together in person. The adventures they had were endless, and Theodosia spent as much time outside as possible, meeting with Philip whenever they could get away from their studies; both of their fathers insisted on educating their children to the best of their abilities, which often resulted in long, toiling hours of studying law in the case of Philip, and studying Latin, Arithmetic, and a multitude of subjects in the case of Theodosia. They relished Saturday afternoons and Sunday evenings, when their fathers permitted them to engage in whatever activities they wished to spend their time doing, often comprising of long walks in the park together. Theodosia hated parting with Philip when the summer was over, but she still kept in correspondence with him through letters while he was at boarding school. On a particular sunny afternoon, Aaron Burr found his daughter leaning against her window with a letter held close to her face. He wondered what it was in the letter that made her smile so.

It read:

_Dear Theodosia,_

__

__

_Your letters never fail to lift my mood. It pleases me to hear your account on ongoing matters at home; Father says little in his letters that does not concern my studies, and never elaborates on the news that interests me most. The most peculiar incident occurred yesterday..._

__

__

__

__

He went on to tell her about an odd conversation with a professor that left him questioning everything he had ever known to be true. Theodosia imagined Philip's grin as he dipped his quill in the ink bottle, tongue stuck out in concentration. He had a way with words that seemed to make the whole letter flow as smoothly as a river, each line written with careful precision.

_Your good friend,_

__

__

_Philip_

__

__

__

__

She picked up a piece of parchment and sucked on her quill, pondering what to write in response. "Theodosia?" he father interrupted her fantasies. "Who have you been writing to?" Theodosia looked up, startled.

"A good friend of mine, Father." She hoped her answer didn't appear too vague.

"Who is this friend of yours, my daughter?" Theodosia hesitated.

"His name is Philip."

"Philip? Might he be-"

"The son of Alexander Hamilton?" Theodosia finished his sentence, sighing. "Yes, he is." Her father gaped at her.

"Theodosia, you are in correspondence with a Hamilton?"

"Father, he is nothing like what you make out his father to be."

"That may be so, but I will not have my daughter associating with a Hamilton!"

"Father, please," Theodosia pleaded, "give him a chance! He is a fine young man, studies hard, and writes in an eloquent manner!"

"I do not doubt that he studies hard or writes eloquently, those would merely be the traits he inherited from his father. I shall not prevent your friendship, Theodosia, but I will insist that you are careful around him. Do not allow yourself to be fooled by his elegant words."

"You know very well that I would not be fool enough to do so, Father." When he left the room, however, Theodosia tucked the letter into a little drawer that stood near her bedside. If ever she needed her mood to be lifted, she would certainly read it again. She picked up her quill once more, dipped it in her bottle of ink, and began writing.


	2. A Winter's Ball

"Absolutely not," Aaron Burr said firmly. Theodosia had spent the last hour begging her father for permission to attend the annual Winter's Ball, hosted by Philip's aunt, Angelica Schuyler Church. She had never been to a formal ball, and was beginning to feel as though she was confined within her house, so great was her boredom. The ball would be a welcome distraction from her tedious studies and long, toiling days of monotony.

"Father, I am sixteen years of age, and perfectly capable of attending a ball!"

"Young lady, I do not appreciate your tone!"

"I am no longer a child!"

"Theodosia, I just want to protect you-"

"Father, I need a distraction, I simply must get out of the house!" Her father sighed, rubbing his temple. "Please?" she asked softly. Looking at his daughter, for a brief second, Aaron Burr thought he was gazing upon his wife, before coming to his senses. His daughter had his dark brown eyes, but her strong chin and haughty expression were almost identical to her mother's. Theodosia looked up at him. "Mother would have wanted me to." He closed his eyes, knowing that he could no longer refuse without regretting his decision.

"Very well. You may attend the ball."

"Thank you!" Theodosia wrapped her arms around him. He smiled, holding her close.

"Wait here," he ordered. Theodosia stood obediently, wondering what he would do. Her father made his way upstairs, and she heard him bustling around in one of the rooms before he found what he was looking for.

"Father?" she called. 

"Close your eyes," he called back. "And turn around." She did so, curious. She heard him enter the room behind her. "Open them," he whispered. Theodosia whirled around. She gasped when she saw what he was holding.

"Oh, Father!" A beautiful, midnight-blue silk gown adorned with lace hung from his arms. Theodosia spun around in a circle holding it, laughing with delight. "I love it!"

"It was your mother's," her father said, looking pleased. "She told me... she wanted you to have it when you grew old enough. You have grown so tall in the last few years, I am certain it will fit you."

"Thank you," she whispered, tears brimming in her eyes. "I love you, Father."

"I too, my Theodosia. But be sure to choose wisely, be wary of any man who asks you to dance." Theodosia gave him a playful glare.

"I will, Father," she promised. She ran upstairs to try the dress on, with her father shaking his head behind her, reflecting on how quickly time seemed to pass. In the seconds that his back was turned, his little girl had somehow managed to blossom into a young woman.

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

"The carriage has arrived!" Theodosia heard her father call her. She anxiously looked herself over in the mirror, forehead scrunched. She had styled her hair in an elegant knot, with loose strands trailing down and neatly tucked behind her ears. "Theodosia?" She hurried downstairs.

"Coming, coming!"

"I just wanted to be sure," he chuckled, helping her into the carriage. "Remember-"

"Choose wisely, be wary, I _know, _Father!" she exclaimed, exasperated.__

____

____

"That still applies," he said, giving her a stern look, "but what I care most about is that you enjoy yourself, Theodosia."

"I will, Father." She waved goodbye as the horse galloped away. "I love you!" She grinned, bouncing a little in her excitement. Her first ball! _I wonder who I'll meet! Oh, the dancing will be simply splendid! _she thought. Theodosia slowly nodded off as she fantasized, before falling asleep. She dreamt of ballgowns and waltzes, feet moving back and forth. _One, two, three, one, two, three...___

_____ _

_____ _

"Ma'am, we have arrived," the coachman called, waking Theodosia. She thanked him as he helped her down. She hitched her skirts and made her way to the grand mansion, trailing behind a group of older ladies who were gossiping about the latest fashions. She gasped as they stepped inside, taking in everything around her. The large chandelier that hung from the ceiling and was adorned with crystals, the tall pillars with designs carved from mahogany, the endless flood of people swarming to and fro, the ladies laden with heavy jewelry. She made her way through the crowd, marveling at the decorations. A waiter offered her wine, and she politely declined, knowing how horrified her father would be if he had known that she'd been given the chance to try alcohol.

"Oh, sister, do you remember the night you met Alexander? It was much like this one, and there was a large chandelier and all those long pillars-"

"How could I forget, Angie? 'Twas the most magical night of my life." The two sisters laughed as though a secret jest had passed between them. Theodosia looked over her shoulder and saw two handsome ladies in beautiful ballgowns, one a robin's blue and one a pale pink color.

"Hello," the one in the pink dress said to Theodosia. "You look lovely."

"Thank you," she said, blushing. "You both look very charming." She scrambled for something else to say. "I love your dresses." She cringed a little, cursing her awkwardness.

"How sweet of you to say so," the other sister said, smiling at her.

"Mother?" a boy behind her said, "May I sample the champagne?"

"Absolutely not," his mother said firmly. "Philip, you are not yet of age. Your father would be furious." Theodosia gasped and turned around to find herself face to face with Philip Hamilton.

"Philip?" she asked, shocked. "I certainly did not expect to see you here." She couldn't help the smile that spread across her face; she had last seen Philip when he left for King's at the end of that summer.

"Theo?" he asked, just as surprised to see her. Theodosia smiled at the use of her nickname, one that Philip had adopted the summer they met. "I came home for a few weeks, it was my intention to visit Aunt Angelica. And attend the ball, of course."

"Philip, you know each other?" Philip's mother asked.

"Mother, this is my friend, Theodosia Burr," Philip introduced them. "Theo, this is my mother-"

"Elizabeth Schuyler Hamilton," his mother said, extending her hand with a smile. "I insist you call me Eliza."

"It is a pleasure to meet you, Miss- Eliza," Theodosia corrected herself.

"This is my aunt," Philip said, nodding at the lady in the pink dress.

"Angelica Schuyler Church," the woman said, shaking Theodosia's hand with a firm grip. "Call me Angelica." Theodosia's eyes widened when she realized the mansion belonged to Angelica and her husband, and it was she who had arranged the ball. She didn't notice Eliza was saying something to her until Philip nudged her.

"I beg your pardon, what were you asking?" she asked, flushed.

"Am I correct in my notion that you are Aaron Burr's daughter?" Eliza asked her, not vexed at having had to repeat the question. Theodosia hesitated before nodding, wondering if Eliza would disapprove of her friendship with Philip like her father had.

"I have heard him speak of you," Eliza said with a smile. "From what Alexander tells me, it is with the highest pride." Theodosia looked up in surprise. Eliza didn't seem to mind in the least that she was a Burr, to her great relief. She wondered what her father had said about her to Alexander Hamilton.

"Well, do not let us keep you, I am sure you would like to have a little fun. After all, this is a ball," Angelica said, winking at her. Theodosia decided that she quite liked both Eliza and Angelica. Philip was lucky to have strong women surrounding him in his life. His mother and aunt both reminded Theodosia of her mother. She wondered if her mother had known Eliza.

"Oh, look, the dancing had begun!" Eliza said, as the music began playing. Theodosia admired the people around her, moving back and forth to the rhythm. Her feet longed to join them, for she loved to dance.

"Miss Burr, care to dance?" Philip asked her, offering her his arm with a grin. Theodosia stared at him for a second before breaking into a smile.

"I would love to, Mister Hamilton." He led her away from Eliza and Angelica to the center of the ballroom.

"Do you know how?" he asked her. She nodded.

"My mother taught me." She smiled fondly at the memories.

"We were taught at school," Philip laughed. "I wish you had been there to witness the boys learning the waltz, it was a scene of absolute chaos." Theodosia smirked as he took both of her hands and began doing the step that other gentlemen around him were engaged in. One, two, three, one, two, three... they moved together in perfect synchrony. Theodosia laughed out loud as he spun her, no longer caring if those around her noticed. One, two, three, one, two, three... everything blurred into a daze, and Theodosia wondered if she was dreaming as Philip spun her again, this time catching her shoulders and looking directly into her eyes as they swayed backward and forward, backward and forward. One, two, three, one, two, three... Theodosia found herself gazing into Philip's eyes, and she could see her own reflection in them. For a moment, she thought he was looking at her mother, before remembering where she was. She didn't pull away. As the dance came to an end, Philip's hands moved down to meet Theodosia's, and they remained in the same position for a few moments after everyone had already stopped, neither wanting it to end. 

__

__

__"Thank you," Theodosia whispered, beaming. "That was... magical."_ _

____

____

"My pleasure, Miss Burr," Philip grinned slyly, bowing his head at her the same way he had when they first met. They made their way back to Eliza and Angelica, who were sipping champagne and laughing at something Angelica had whispered to her sister.

"Hello, dear," Eliza hugged Philip. She beamed at Theodosia. "I caught a glimpse of the two of you dancing, you were marvelous."

"Thank you," Theodosia said, glad that Eliza didn't mind her dancing with her son. "I must be on my way, I promised Father to be home by midnight and the carriage ride is quite long, 'tis is rather far away." Philip kissed her hand, and she was filled with an almost giddy sense of delight.

"I trust we will see each other again?" he asked, holding her gaze. She stared into his eyes, feeling as though he was falling, drowning in the endless pools of brown... she shook herself and tried to concentrate on anything other than Philip.

"Soon," she promised. The two of them had forgotten that Eliza and Angelica were standing right next to them. The two sisters were once again laughing, causing both Philip and Theodosia to blush. "I really must be going."

"Allow me to escort you to your carriage," Philip said, taking her hand. She once again suppressed the feeling of bliss that washed over her at his touch. Theodosia bid farewell to Eliza and Angelica before walking out of the mansion with Philip. He helped her into the carriage.

"Farewell!" she called to him as the horses galloped away. He waved back, a grin spread across his face. Theodosia leaned back and closed her eyes, smiling. As long as she lived, she was sure that this was a night she would never forget.


	3. The Flame In My Heart

Theodosia was curled up on her bed reading a book when she heard a knock on her window. She looked up, startled, and walked over to her window, hesitating and wondering if she had imagined it. The knock came again, and she cautiously pulled it open, finding herself face to face with Philip Hamilton, who was obviously flushed, but grinning despite. Her hand flew to her mouth, and Philip quickly climbed through the window, looking stricken. "I'm sorry, it was not my intention to frighten you," he apologized, eyes wide. Theodosia shook her head and pulled him up, torn between scolding him and smiling. She decided on a raised eyebrow.

"What are you doing outside of my window?"

"Why, Miss Burr, should it not be clear that I meant to pay you a visit?" Philip flashed her a charming smile. Theodosia couldn't help but laugh at this.

"Theodosia, are you all right?" Aaron Burr called from downstairs.

"Yes, Father!" Theodosia shouted, hoping her response had not come too quickly. She turned to Philip, alarmed.

"If he catches you here-"

"Your father will have my throat," Philip finished, nodding. "I know. I just wanted so badly to see you again."

"Why Philip, the ball was a mere three days ago!"

"Three days! I would not have been had it been three years! These past few days have been so dull, I simply could not think of anything but-" he stopped, ears turning red. Theodosia blushed as well, for Philip had been taking up her mind as well. Daydreams of dancing with him, holding his hand, laughing together, had occupied nearly every waking moment for her, though she could not for the life of her fathom why. It had only been one dance, after all, though a magical one.

"How did you climb up to my window?" Theodosia asked, hoping to draw the conversation away from Philip.

"Oh, it was no great matter," Philip waved it off. "I climbed onto your windowsill, the one outside of your kitchen, then pulled myself up to another windowsill, I think it may have been your father's room-"

"Philip!" Theodosia cried out, astonished that he would risk such a thing.

"-then swung myself up to a tree branch that was conveniently located outside of your room, and here I am! I must say, that tree is rather helpful for sneaking in, do you not agree?" Theodosia frowned.

"You should not have to sneak in, Philip, I would rather you not risk Father catching you."

"I know, I was simply afraid that he would disapprove of my visiting you. He has no reason to trust me, after all, us never having met before. You know how our fathers get along."

"They loathe each other," Theodosia sighed. "I suppose I see your point. Besides, he would always have an eye on us, never give us a moment alone."

"My father would likely do the same," Philip assured her. "Perhaps someday we can convince them otherwise."

"Perhaps." Theodosia smiled, echoing her reply from their first conversation, years ago.

"Do you remember the first time we met?" Philip asked, smiling as well.

"How could I forget?" Theodosia laughed, the memory of Philip's flustered face as he stammered an apology coming into her mind. "You complimented my garden, and told me-"

"It looked beautiful, just like you." Philip nodded, his gaze lingering on Theodosia. "You still do. Look beautiful, I mean. Well, what I mean is-"

"I know," Theodosia cut him off with a grin. "Thank you." Philip nodded, ears and neck now beet red. "I missed you while you were away, you know. I always do. It was a wonderful surprise to have you home before the summer."

"As did I," Philip said, giving her a little bow. "I will hate to leave once more."

"When?" Theodosia asked, secretly hoping the day would not be too soon. She hated the thought of bidding Philip farewell again, especially after this new, unfamiliar feeling had awakened inside her when thinking of him.

"In two weeks."

"Two weeks!" Theodosia hadn't realized that a sigh left her mouth until Philip smiled sadly at her, sighing as well.

"Yes, Father wishes for me to return as soon as I can, he regards my education as my largest priority."

"As does mine." Theodosia smiled as she recalled the summer nights when she and Philip would throw down their books and rush to the park, hoping to have an hour to themselves before dark, when they would be expected at home.

"It is but a year before I graduate," Philip reminded her, taking a seat on her bed and letting his legs swing a little. "I will return for the summer."

"Summer seems an eternity away."

"I shall be back before you know I am gone," he promised.

"I should hope so," Theodosia said, sitting down as well. She moved her hand closer to his without realizing it. "Is that why you came? In order to tell me?"

"Well-" Philip hesitated, his blush returning. "There is something else-" He placed his hand over hers protectively, and gently lifted it up to press a kiss to it. Theodosia's cheeks turned a light shade of crimson, and she marveled at the feel of his touch, so soft and gentle. She never wanted to let go. Neither of them ever knew who leaned in first, but it was a moment later when Theodosia became aware that their lips had met. It was nothing more than a light kiss, their lips briefly brushing together, but it was a second of pure bliss, and as Theodosia leaned in for another, she wondered if there existed an elation beyond this, for in that moment, such a thought seemed rather impossible.

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

After that their meetings, at the park or at Theodosia's house if her father was busy, became daily, and the two felt that they could spend hours talking with one another, for there were so many subjects of conversation to explore. Philip would tell her about his studies at King's, and Theodosia would in turn tell him about what she was learning at home; everything from Latin and Arithmetic and Greek to French and music and dancing. ("You are already a remarkable dancer!" Philip had remarked, to which Theodosia had responded, "Father wishes me to be educated in good etiquette, it pleases him for me to practice such things.") They would occasionally play a game of chess; Philip made rash moves and Theodosia was hesitant to take Philip's pieces, so they were reasonably well matched. Philip recited poetry for her, and showed Theodosia poems of his own, many of which he had written for her. Sometimes, when Philip had snuck in, Theodosia would slip downstairs and play a tune on the piano, while he listened from her room, a smile on his face as he imagined Theodosia's delicate fingers dancing over the keys. They would part only when nighttime approached and they would be expected at home, but there was always time enough for a farewell kiss. Theodosia didn't mind these farewells, for she knew they would see each other the very next day.

It was a mere three days before Philip had to to leave for King's, and the two were at the park, having stopped to sit down on a bench as Theodosia showed Philip how to weave flowers into a chain. The snow had all since melted, and given way for the first flowers to sprout. After several unsuccessful attempts, he managed to produce a decent chain, and he set it over Theodosia's head in the manner of a crown. As she laughed and tucked a flower behind his ear, he decided now was as good of a time as ever to ask Theodosia what had been on his mind ever since their first kiss.

"Theo, how do you think your father would react if I asked for his permission to court you?" he asked very quickly, wincing a little at the abruptness of his question. Theodosia stared at him as he flushed. "Of course, I shall be leaving very soon, but there is just a year until my graduation, and perhaps he would think it unsuitable, but-" Theodosia silenced him with a kiss, to his surprise. She gently pulled a way as her face broke into a wide smile.

"Philip, relax," she chuckled, "did you think I would respond in indignation? I detest the thought of entering a secret courtship, for why should we allow our names to keep us apart? No love should be hidden." Philip visibly relaxed, his shoulders loosening as he pulled out his handkerchief, wiping away the perspiration on his brow.

"I only hope he will grant us his consent."

"As do I, but nothing will prevent us from seeing each other," Theodosia told him firmly. He didn't doubt her words for a second. It was clear from the tilt in her chin and the determination in her eyes that nothing could keep her away from him, and for that he was grateful. "Come, let us ask Father now!" She stood up and set off in the direction of her house.

"Now?" Philip asked, hurrying to match her pace.

"There is hardly a point in wasting time, I would sooner know his opinion than have to continue keeping our meeting a secret from him. I feared yesterday when I left the house that his suspicions we beginning to arise, I could feel his eyes on me as I closed the door." They soon reached the house, and Theodosia pulled Philip through the door, calling to her father.

"Father, would you meet us in the drawing room?"

"Us?" her father asked, his footsteps growing closer. "Theodosia, who is with you?" He stepped inside the room, about to approach his daughter, but drew short upon seeing Philip. "Theodosia," he began in a stern voice, "why is Philip Hamilton in my house?"


	4. Promises and Goodbyes

"Good day, sir," Philip said, bowing his head a little. "I apologize for my intrusion. It was not my intention to upset you."

"As you know, Father," Theodosia cut in quickly before he could interrupt, "Philip and I have been in correspondence for a while now, and we have formed a close friendship."

"I believe I do not recall how long this _friendship _has been in place between the two of you." Aaron Burr looked at Philip suspiciously. It was evident that he did not entirely trust his word.__

____

____

"Several years now," Theodosia said hurriedly. "We spent summer nights together and kept in communication through letters while Philip was at school. Recently, we have been spending time in each other's company, and have developed a mutual feeling of appreciation for each other as such."

"Theodosia, do you intend to tell me that you fancy this boy as a suitor?" her father asked, trying not to show his scowl.

"As a matter of fact, I intend to ask for permission to court your daughter, sir," Philip said, beginning to doubt the likelihood of obtaining his consent.

"Theodosia?" her father asked, turning to face her, "is that so? Have you been spending your days with Philip?" He had wondered what urgent matter required Theodosia to spend nearly every free moment in her room or at the park.

"Yes, Father." He turned back to Philip, scrutinizing him carefully as though he was an explosive about to detonate.

"How do I know I should trust you with my daughter?" he asked, a part of him hoping the boy would give a thoughtless answer, and with it a reason for his disapproval.

"Sir, never before have I felt the way I do when in your daughter's company," Philip replied. "I would never do anything to cause her hurt or harm, and would never encourage her to engage in anything against her will. I do not wish to use our relationship for personal gain, nor do I wish to take part in a relationship without your consent. We respect your opinion on the matter, but kindly ask you to consider before giving us your answer." He watched Theodosia's father visibly deflate a little, before sighing and asking Theodosia,

"My daughter, will entering this courtship bring you happiness?"

"Yes, Father, I too have never felt such joy before as when in Philip's company," Theodosia told him, hardly believing their luck.

"Very well. I will give my consent, on one condition." Philip and Theodosia shared a look of apprehension, both of them hoping the request would be reasonable. "Young man, you must give me your word that you will take good care of my daughter, and give me no reason to doubt your feelings for her."

"I promise to take care of your daughter, and never give you reason to doubt my feelings for her," Philip vowed, taking Theodosia's hand. "Thank you, sir."

"You are welcome. Oh, and one more thing." 

"Yes, sir?"

"Nobody is to ask for my daughter's hand before she is eighteen years of age. And perhaps longer than that. Is that clear?"

"Yes, sir," Philip said, turning red. Both he and Theodosia blushed. "Good day to you, sir."

As Aaron Burr watched the glowing young couple leave, he sighed a little, shaking his head. "My, where has the time gone?" he muttered to himself, a small smile spreading across his lips.

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

The remaining days had flew by in the blink of an eye, and all too soon Theodosia found herself bidding farewell to Philip. He had invited her to the park in order to say goodbye privately. They had spent the entire afternoon talking with each other.

"Write often," he said, standing up to leave.

"I will," Theodosia assured him, rising as well. "You must write long letters. It will be very dull without you."

"I shall write pages upon pages of detail," Philip promised, taking her hand. "Anything for you, Theo." Theodosia smiled.

"I shall spend my days eagerly awaiting their arrival." They walked to the Hamilton residence together, where a carriage was waiting for Philip. He bid farewell to his parents, who had been waiting for them. Theodosia instantly tecognized Philip's mother, Eliza.

"How are you?" Eliza asked, hugging her.

"Well, thank you," she replied, glancing at the man beside her. It was the first time she had ever seen Alexander Hamilton, though she had heard plenty about him from her father.

"Theodosia, I presume?" he asked, extending his hand.

"Yes." She shook it, a little nervous, hoping that this exchange would go smoother than her father's. Hamilton looked her in the eyes, and Theodosia held his gaze, holding her breath as well. Then Hamilton smiled, and she relaxed.

"My son chose well," he said, and squeezed Philip's shoulder, who grinned at her. Theodosia grinned back. They shared a final kiss before he climbed inside, and Theodosia waved to him as the carriage grew farther and farther away, until Philip was nothing but a small figure in the distance.


	5. Never In Doubt

Theodosia paced as she waited, too excited to make conversation with Philip's parents, who were standing beside her. It was a hot summer's day, and she had been waiting for what seemed like hours outside of the Hamilton residence, but she didn't mind the heat in the least, for she was to be reunited with Philip today, who was expected to arrive any moment now.

"Theodosia, dear, look!" Eliza cried out, and Theodosia's head snapped up so quickly she felt momentarily faint. She could vaguely make out the carriage that was coming their way.

"Philip!" she gasped, part of her wanting to run, to sprint to the carriage and fling her arms around Philip, but she was uncertain if doing so would bide well with his parents. She forced herself to wait, bouncing slightly on her heels and frantically waving in hopes that Philip might see her. The carriage soon neared them, slowing to a halt, and Theodosia waited impatiently in anticipation for several moments before Philip clambered out, the same grin she had over the years grown to love. Their eyes met, and Theodosia could see her delight reflected in Philip's deep brown irises. Eliza enveloped him in a hug while Hamilton tousled his hair, beaming.

"Graduated with honors, top of the class!" he told Theodosia proudly while Philip embraced him. Theodosia smiled, glad that Philip's hard work had paid off. Philip finally turned to Theodosia, and she threw herself into his arms. They shared a passionate kiss right in front of his parents, both of them too consumed in their joy to worry about what they might think. To their relief once they had pulled away, Eliza laughed and Hamilton only made a face, as though he wished he could unsee the brief display of love. Theodosia laughed as well and clung to Philip, hardly daring to believe that at long last, he was hers. After several more minutes of hugging and laughing and crying, Philip caught Theodosia's arm.

"Come with me," he whispered, and she gladly followed him to the park to fill each other in on all that had passed since his leaving.

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Summer passed all too quickly, and come September Philip was once again at his books. Despite their longing to spend time together, Philip's studies occupied a great part of his day, to his immense chagrin.

"Father insists upon it," he told Theodosia, sighing. "I must admit reading law can be rather dull at times." Theodosia sighed as well. The schedule Philip's father had set for him kept him occupied all afternoon, and it was only after six that he could finally escape the house. Sundays were free, however, and on those days the two relished every moment they could spend together.

Months passed in this manner, and even on days when free time was scarce, Theodosia still felt that she had never been so happy before, at least not since her mother had fallen ill. Both of them attended the next Winter's Ball, Philip ignoring the flirtatious looks from those who were hoping to dance with him and Theodosia declining every request made by eager young men. The two had eyes only for each other, and spent the entire evening dancing together. The snow melted and gave way for spring to take over, and Theodosia's little garden still thrived under the care of Theodosia and Philip, who tended to the flowers together. Summertime brought sunshine and cheer, and hours spent reciting poetry, playing chess, and taking long walks in the park. With every memory they created together, their love for each other only grew.

It was one evening in late August when Philip, having written to Theodosia, invited her to the park, though he hadn't explained why in the brief letter, merely request she meet him there. Theodosia hurriedly threw on her shawl and all but ran, both excited and worried. Sure enough, Philip was waiting for her, shifting nervously as he paced in front of the bench. He brightened upon seeing her.

"You came," he breathed, looking oddly relieved.

"Of course I did," Theodosia laughed softly. She took Philip's hand. "Is there something wrong?"

"No, nothing wrong." Philip began fidgeting with his hands. "Well- I wanted to tell you- what I mean is, I meant to inform you, Theo- no, not that-"

"You can tell me, Philip." It was so rare that Philip displayed nervousness, and the last time Theodosia remembered seeing Philip this agitated was when he had asked her father for permission to court her.

"I love you," Philip said, taking her free hand so that they were standing face to face. He gazed into her eyes. "I had never believed love this great existed before I fell in love with you. I can think of no better way to spend the rest of my life than spend it with you." Theodosia's eyes widened, but no words came out of her mouth as she grappled for something to say, certain that Philip expected a reply.

"We are in agreement, then," she managed to stammer out. Philip looked relieved.

"Every moment I have spent with you in the past year has been a moment that I will treasure for the rest of my life," he continued with a little more strength in his words. "You bring out the best in me, you give me my confidence, the knowledge that I could push through trying times, for there would always be something worth emerging for. You are the most intelligent, witty, incredible person I have ever had the good fortune to know, and I cannot fathom living a life without you in it, for the only room with a view in it is a room with you in it." He drew a breath, and Theodosia's held hers. "Theodosia Burr, will you do me the honor of becoming my wife?"

"Yes, a million times over, yes!" Theodosia gasped, "Oh, Philip, I would love nothing more!" Philip eyes glistened as he slid a beautiful ring with a diamond stone in the center onto Theodosia's finger. Theodosia's eyes filled as well, a tear of joy slipping down her cheek as she pressed her lips to Philip's, more certain than she had ever been of anything in her life that this what she wanted. When they finally pulled away, both their cheeks were wet, but neither of them could stop smiling. "Philip?" Theodosia asked softly.

"What is it, love?" Philip asked, still in a dream-like state as he gazed at Theodosia with adoration.

"Have you asked my father for his permission?" Philip snapped out of his trance, staring at Theodosia, his jaw having dropped open. Theodosia sighed. She was not looking forward to this meeting.

Half an hour later, the couple found themselves shifting awkwardly in the drawing room, next to Aaron Burr, who appeared to be facing an existential crisis judging by the way he was pulling at his hair and muttering to himself. "Father?" Theodosia prompted him to speak tentatively. To their surprise, her father turned to Philip.

"What have you to offer my daughter?" Philip didn't look away.

"I may not have a noble title or a battalion to command, but I love your daughter more than the sun loves the moon, and will gladly give my honor to protect her and give her the life she deserves. No matter what it takes, I will give her the world. I assure you, my love for her is never in doubt." Burr took this in, and saw in Philip's earnest gaze that his words were not to be doubted. He clasped Philip's hand, having made his decision.

"I have never seen my daughter full of such joy as when she is with you. I have not been given the joy of seeing her in such happiness since her mother passed." His voice caught a little before he took a breath to steady himself. "I trust everything you have told me, but I ask only one thing of you."

"Anything, sir."

"Be true, son."

"I will, sir." Philip turned to Theodosia, beaming, before she flew into his arms, laughing and crying all at once. No, Theodosia, decided, there couldn't possibly be a happiness greater than this, so as long as nothing could take Philip away from her.


	6. Utterly Helpless

"Theodosia?" She heard her father calling her name from downstairs. It was late November, and Theodosia was mending and old dress, humming to herself as she did so.

"One moment, Father!" she called back, concentrating on her last stitch.

"Theodosia!" her father called again. This time, she detected a hint of urgency in his tone. "A messenger boy is here, he claims to have a message for you!" Theodosia dropped her needles at this, almost slipping in her haste to get to the door. Her heart pounded as she pulled it open, praying the news wasn't about Philip.

"Are you Theodosia Burr?"

"Yes, I am." _God, not Philip, anything but Philip..._

__

"Miss, I am incredibly sorry, I was sent by Miss Church, 'tis young Philip, miss-"

"What has happened?" Theodosia asked, frozen with fear.

"Philip Hamilton was shot early this morning. He is in fatal condition, they brought him to the Church residence. I was told to alert you." Theodosia's felt her heart stop as her blood went cold, a scream caught in the back of her throat, fighting to be let out. She sank to the ground, shaking, her mind struggling to register what she had just been told. _Philip. Shot. Fatal. _It couldn't be true, she'd seen Philip just yesterday. It couldn't be Philip, not her Philip. "You have not much time, miss, I saw him, he appears to have lost a good amount of blood." Theodosia shoved a fist into her mouth to stop the rising sob from spilling out. She couldn't break down, couldn't give way to the overwhelming emotions threatening to consume her. She had to be strong for Philip. She looked up at her father, whose face was impassive, impossible for her to read.__

____

____

"Go," he said, clasping her hand. "The boy needs you." Theodosia was startled to see tears in her father's eyes, and it was those tears that pulled her back into reality.

"There is a carriage waiting for you, miss," the messenger told her. Theodosia nodded her thanks, rising shakily and leaning back, taking a moment to steady herself before following him out the door. "Hold on, Philip," she whispered. _Please, Philip, just stay alive.  
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

___Theodosia didn't remember the journey to the Church residence, or staring numbly at the countryside as she passed by endless meadows, all of it blurring into a daze. She didn't remember stepping inside, being greeted by Angelica, who had red eyes and wet cheeks, who told her, "He has been asking for you." She didn't remember being guided to a room, or pushing open the door, or letting out a scream as her eyes landed upon Philip, his forehead drenched in sweat, his shirt soaked with blood. She didn't remember rushing to his side, pleading with him to wake up, to come back to her, or the despairing wail Eliza let out as she begged God to spare her son, or the genuine grief on Alexander's face as he gazed brokenly at his wife and eldest child._ _ _

___"Philip, stay with me," she pleaded desperately, shaking him. She laid her head beside him, sobbing. "Don't leave me," she whispered. She received no answer._ _ _

___"He was conscious when they brought him in," Hamilton said, turning to Theodosia with hollow eyes. "I thought you should know. He-he reminded us how Eliza would play the piano-" here he broke off, before taking another breath and continuing, tears flooding down his face. "H-he ch-changed the key every time."_ _ _

___"He said he wanted to-to say goodbye-" Eliza swallowed, taking Theodosia's hand. "He wanted to say goodbye to you. He told me he would keep fighting, for you."_ _ _

___"Thank you," Theodosia whispered to Philip. She looked at Eliza. "I just c-cannot imagine, he might not- might not..."_ _ _

___"I know," Eliza said softly, trying to soothe the sobbing girl while struggling to keep herself together. "I know."_ _ _

___And so they waited, each minute the equivalent of a year, every second agonizing as they were forced to watch Philip's life tick away, one breath at a time. But he was alive, and while his chest still rose and his blood still pulsed, they could do nothing but hope for the impossible, pray against the unthinkable. Then Philip opened his eyes. Theodosia gasped, staring at Philip with the slightest, faintest hope rising in her. Philip blinked up at her, eyes glazed. "Theo?" he whispered, grappling for her hand. She grasped it, eyes flooding with tears._ _ _

___"I'm here, Philip," she whispered, "I'm here."_ _ _

___"Wanted... to say... goodbye," Philip gasped, struggling to choke out the words, his breathing ragged._ _ _

___"Philip, I beg you, do not say that," Theodosia implored. "Everything... everything will be all right..."_ _ _

___"All right..." Philip echoed, beginning to drift away._ _ _

___"No! Philip, stay with me!" Theodosia cried out, blinded in her grief, her beseeching in vain._ _ _

___"I love you, Theodosia," Philip murmured, closing his eyes._ _ _

___"I love you, Philip." Theodosia pressed her lips to his, and he lifted his hand weakly to caress her cheek. Then he dropped it abruptly, his hand going limp. Theodosia pulled away, still holding his hand, lifeless and unmoving. She didn't realize she was screaming until Hamilton tried to guide her away, murmuring that there was nothing she could do for him anymore. She clung to him, refusing to let go, refusing to believe this was real, not a nightmare, that Philip had gone and left her alone, all alone. She begged him to return, pleaded for the impossible, flung herself onto his chest and let the tears drench onto his blood-stained shirt. The silence was deafening, punctured only by Eliza's long wail and Hamilton's whispers, voice cracking as he tried to comfort his wife, legs threatening to give way as they held each other, mourned together. Theodosia only left his side when they came to collect him, unable to watch them load Philip, her Philip, onto a stretcher to be carried away, away from her, but she managed to look back at him one last time. His skin was stiff and cold, his expression blank. But worst of all were his eyes, devoid of all warmth and light. Gone was the joy she had so often seen dancing in them, replaced by a cloudy white fog. She could no longer see her reflection. As she was pulled away, throat raw from screaming, eyes red from crying, unable to speak, to hear, to sense anything around her, she felt completely and utterly helpless. She knew that as long as she lived, she would never forget those eyes, staring up at her. Dead._ _ _


	7. It's Only A Matter Of Time

Epilogue

Theodosia Burr stood on the end of the deck. The sharp gusts of wind whipped her hair around her face, rough waves of water soaking her clothing. A chill ran down her spine as the ship suddenly turned over, prompting screams and wails from those around her. Only she stood calmly in place as it began to sink, while the passengers ran from one side to another, desperately trying to find means of escape. A few even jumped overboard, attempting to swim away, only to sink back down once more. It seemed that the _Patriot _had been doomed from the day it set sail.__

____

____

She had been on her way to visit her father when the storm had begun. Her father, charged with the murder of Alexander Hamilton after that duel, the one that had made him the target of scorn and public outrage. Hamilton had died in the same manner as his son, in the same spot, with the same set of guns, and as Theodosia had learned soon after his death, the same way Philip had. Philip, who had aimed at the sky. Foolish, brave, kind, Philip. She had wanted so badly to feel anger towards him for accepting the challenge, for going down with honor, for risking his life to defend his father's legacy, but she couldn't, no matter how hard she tried. Even eleven years late, the pain hadn't faded in the slightest, though over time she had grown used to it.

It was of Philip that she thought as the ship sunk into the sea, people flailing helplessly in the water while it slowly consumed everything around them. Her Philip, taken from her far too soon. His face was the last clear memory in her mind, the picture that she clung to as water filled her mouth, her nose, her lungs.

"I can't wait to see you again," she whispered as the ship went under, reuniting the two lovers at long last.


End file.
